Witty Wednesday

I can't remember where I found these, but they gave me a chuckle. Hope they do the same for you!

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

 I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

 I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

 I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night - more kisses begin with Miller Lite than with Kay.

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid The Projects" routing option.

Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to> prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

 Is it just me or do high school kids appear dumber every year? 

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are  going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far. 

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys  in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey -  but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away,  in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

Yup, it's Monday.

Five Diet Tips

Today I thought I'd share five tips about how to maintain your weight. I use all five of these quite often.... um, well, ignore that fact. : )

1. When making brownies or cake, don’t use the mixer. Stir that batter by hand. I don’t mean a wimpy hand mixer; I mean get that wooden spoon out and stir, baby. This burns whatever calories you would consume when eating the finished product. Right?

2. Never, never, ever give in to your own craving. Buy one for your child instead and then teach him or her the value of sharing. Which, as we know, is an important life skill. Besides, we all know, there are no calories if it’s not yours.

3.Walk as you eat. This is a no brainer. Not only are you actually exercising as you eat, chances are, the calories won’t catch up to you.

4.I do not believer in completely denying yourself. This just leads to binging later. If you’re eating chocolate like... I don’t know... a handful of chocolate chips or M & Ms, add a teaspoon of peanut butter. We all know protein is good for you and will help you metabolize sugar and hey, peanut butter has protein. The fact that it goes really well with chocolate is just an added bonus.

5.Now this is a super seekrit trick I’ve used for years. Add a packet of maple and brown sugar instant oatmeal to your chocolate chip cookie recipe. Not only does this give it an excellent subtle flavor, it adds fiber to the cookies and, you know, that makes them good for you.

Happy eating!

Welcome!!

Hello everyone.

Welcome to my first post on my new blog! Isn't it gorgeous? I can say that because I take no credit. That goes to the talented Crystal Posey, web mistress extraordinaire.

So...why the switch from writermomof5 to Shawna Thomas? With my first ever Carina Press novel publishing soon, I thought it was time to be a little less mom and a little more writer. Besides, it's really mom of 6 now.

In case you missed it, my very first ever Carina Press novel, ALTERED DESTINY, is publishing soon!

So, that's all I have for now. I will be switching my focus from my pen name (and all that comes with it) to this persona, so please, check back in.