I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.. - W. C. Fields
We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you. - Winston Churchill
Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty.. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.. - Phyllis Diller
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere. - Billy Crystal
And the cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good spit it out.